Wednesday, January 20, 2010

MY LOVE!!

I sat beside my fiancĂ© looking at her serene, phlegmatic face which today evinced an uncharacteristic disheveled appearance. She donned as royal silky blue dress. She always looked stunning in it. But something seemed to be wrong with her. She didn’t look as gorgeous as she always used to. I whispered into her ears, lest the people standing around would get to hear me. I asked, “Dear, what’s wrong?? Why do you look so low today?” She did not reply. She just nodded her head adamantly. I was not able to understand her. “Please talk to me.” She always spoke her heart to me whenever she was with me. But today nothing seemed to work for me.
I tried to hold her hand, but reticently she pulled her hand away. I was unable to understand what was wrong. She was never so annoyed with me in the 6 years that we were together before getting engaged about a week ago. The clock seemed to turn around. I still remember how happy she was at the day of the engagement. Wearing a grandeur mehendi and dressed up in a red-orange sari she had picked up at the Mall. That was her favorite color, so was mine. It had to be; after all she liked it. I reminiscence the way she danced after the engagement. I was head over heels in love with her. Our college friends had nicknamed us the ‘Love Birds’ and a few others would envy us too. After all, 6 years was quite some time. I had bumped into her while I was at my undergraduate college. She was in the same class as mine. Her simplicity, innocence and philanthropic nature had totally floored me. The mere thought of talking to her for the first time, used to leave me perspiring and gasping for breath. My friends always told me to at least give it a shot. I had made up my mind to speak to her. That night I was unable to sleep. I kept rehearsing before the mirror on how I would introduce myself, hitting myself on the head whenever I would come up with something foolish. It was one of the shortest nights I ever came across in my life.
The next day morning as I reached college, my heart was beating faster than usual. As I stepped into class, I saw her sitting where she usually used to. She was clad in a royal silky blue dress. She looked absolutely gorgeous. I almost lost my footing as I walked up and sat on the adjacent bench hoping to get an opportunity to strike a conversation. Just as I was about to call her, she turned around and said, “Hi..! Umm, do have an extra ball-point pen? It seems I have left mine at home.” I can’t explain how hard it was to hold back my emotions at that moment of truth. I calmly replied, “Anhh.. Oh!! Yes.” I offered her my Parker pen. She stared back almost baffled and replied, “Sorry, I wanted a ball-point pen not an Eraser!” Ever since, I made it a point to carry an extra pen, a pencil, an eraser and even an extra notebook. Love, makes you do all the stupid things in the world. No wonder. Soon we were good friends and the more I spent time with her, my feelings for her kept going to a different level. Soon I realized she was a great singer too. Once, I remember giving my extra coaching classes a miss just to go and watch her perform. Though I was unlucky to get a pass for her show, I luckily managed a place at the window from where I could get a clear view. She was really happy to see me there.
Days, weeks and months went by. We had come so close that everyone felt we were in love with each other. Rather at least I was. One fine day, after college I gathered the courage to ask her out for a date. She agreed. I took her to the lake side. We sat on the small cliff overlooking the lake. With a heavy heart I pulled out a red rose from my sling bag, handed it over to her and said “I love you!” I was not able to look her in the eyes. She seemed to take the rose. I smiled. It had worked. Just then she hit me back with it. Dazzled I looked up, “Stupid! What on earth took you so long??” Those words rang like an alarm bell. From no-where, I was brimming with energy. A broad smile like a lightning flashed across my face. I was quite hesitant but managed to give her a hug. Since then we were always there for each other till we graduated together and even after that.
She often came over, helped my mother with the household chores, right from cooking real delicacies to even putting up the place in order. My family had accepted her as the bride-to-be. She proved to be an ideal choice as my life partner when she stood by me when my parents passed away in an air crash. She helped me overcome the irredeemable loss. I was left completely shaken, lost my senses. It took me about a year to recuperate from the loss. She persistently made sure I was back as enthusiastic as I was before and resumed my work. After about a few months we decided to get married. As the engagement day drew close, the enthusiasm with which we went shopping together, planning in advance what we would buy for the marriage too made me realize yes I had made the right choice. The Day was here. The pandal was decked up with festoons. She had seen to it that the place was decorated exactly the way she wanted it to be. After all it was really a special day for the both of us. Our dream that we had seen so many times sitting by the lake-side, to spend our lives together, had come true. We were engaged to each other. A few days after our engagement, I was supposed to be taking her out for a film premiere. I left my house. And. I was up here to see her beside me. She looked as if someone had taken away the life in her. I did not like the way she looked. That wonderful bright smile I always loved to see was missing. Suddenly, her mother came up, helped her to her feet and started to take her away. She did not want to leave. Tears rolled down her eyes. Something that was more precious to me than diamonds. I could do nothing. I called out. She was not able to hear. I was scared. What had happened to her? Just as I tried to walk towards her, a heavy door closed on me with a gentle thud. I was left all alone. Darkness had engulfed me. I tried to call out for help. No one was around. She was not there too. How could she leave me alone? I started crying. As I calmed down, all I could hear was a silent murmur followed by the low feeble ring of the bell. I was buried.
© ROHAN S. AMBRE
20th January, 2010

The Word that meant the World to me..




Days and years went by.. right from the time since she started walking.. to the time she scolded me for returning home late from office.. to the evenings when tired and weary I dozed off on the couch only to find myself next morning covered with my blanket with her sleeping by the foot of the couch.. it was something as a father I would always cherish.. She was my source of inspiration.. I still remember the day when she got married.. I received the most valuable gift of my life.. A painting that she had made.. For the past few months she had been working at it.. All day and night.. She would not even let me in her room lest I get a glimpse of it.. It was a silhouette of a man with his daughter holding hands teaching her to walk.. He was leading her out of the house.. I could not stop my tears.. I thought how I would ever be able to live without her.. I let go myself.. She said.. “Be strong.. I am always there with you..” .. It reminded of the day she was born.. Those were her mother’s last words.. I felt the pain in my heart as if someone was trying to thrust a blunt sword right through.. My daughter always stood strong by my side like a pillar supporting an old dilapidated structure.. I was sure that she would never let me feel left alone.. She was a woman of her words.. The disastrous day when I was en-route to our first meeting since her marriage.. I met with a horrifying accident only to be up in the hospital.. I opened my eyes.. and there she was.. I knew she would definitely be there.. Tears rolled down her cheeks.. as she let out a cry and hugged me.. I smiled bleakly.. “Don’t worry.. I am fine!” I said.. But she did not seem to stop.. I did not understand what was wrong.. As I tried to sit up.. I fell off the chair.. The kids playing in the garden along with the young man came running up and helped me onto the chair.. I was horrified.. I felt like crying.. The realization dawned on me.. I had lost my feet in the accident.. How I wished I had died then.. Just as I was about to break down.. I felt a familiar pat on my back.. “Be strong Pa.. We are always there with you..” It had to be.. no one else than my daughter.. She was always so beautiful and charming.. The young man stood by her reassuring me that they would.. He was my son-in-law.. It was a dream, come true for me.. I always wanted to see her happy..
Just as I leaned back with relief on to the wheel-chair and closed my eyes, I felt a tug at my trousers.. It was the small angelic girl.. She was looking at me in anticipation.. She was my grand-daughter.. I looked at her and smiled.. She smiled back and said.. “Pa..” ..Those were her first words..
© ROHAN S. AMBRE
12th December, 2009